Categories of the Gym

For those of you who have gone to the gym constantly at some point in your life, you know about the categories of people that go to the gym. If you don't, let me paint you a picture.

1. Steroid Boy (sometimes girl which is pretty scary). Pretty self-explanatory.
2. Newbie - many can fall under this category. Here are a couple of my favs.
-The person who comes in jeans and gets on cardio machines for 5 minutes each, then moves to the weight machines and lifts as much as he/she can for 1 rep and heads out of the gym after about 30 minutes.
-The person who we see work really hard on some cardio machine for 45 minutes and then don't see for another week if ever again.
3. Gym Rat - Girl with shorts so short they might as well be her boy brief underwear. Always has a "A" shirt on (or politically incorrect: wife beater). More make-up and perfume then most whores wear while working. She must strategically place herself on a machine in the middle of the floor where everyone can see her. Then pull out her cell phone to talk about how "she can't believe that ho did that" or making plans for the weekend and quite loudly at that. This all occurring while she drinks some "Monster" energy drink. Very Healthy indeed.
4. Bigger than I am. These are the guys that are fun to watch. They all walk around like they are built like the 1970's Arnold. What most of these little boys don't know is that just because you walk with your arms popped out from your sides, doesn't mean you have massive obliques. They kind of remind me of monkeys. Gives for a nice giggle though.
5. Athletes. The few and the proud but there are some out there. These are the people that come in with the bare necessities and don't "socialize" outside of their mp3/radio. They have a set routine and know exactly what needs to be done. No fancy drinks, just water. There bodies show what a lot of people strive for but have no idea how to get.

I'm sure I could go on for awhile. The amount of people that convene in this area is amazing. A comedian could find material for years at a gym. It's untapped with possibilities. Unfortunately, we run into #3 ALOT.

When you're trying to read during your cardio, listening to said twit is quite annoying. If you need to talk on your cell that badly, go home. If you need to text messages people, you obviously are not in the right mind set, again, go home. We don't care about your plans or how cute your nails are that you just had done.

I don't take my cell phone in. The gym is like the library, the movie theater or a restaurant, I will not answer inside a public area . I think it's rude to the people you are with (unless a family call is necessary to which I keep very short or walk outside of the restaurant ) or to the people around you. I answer my work cell but that's about it and even then I feel stupid. People got through emergencies before cell phones, it should be okay for an hour and half while I'm at the gym or out to dinner with friends.

So, in short, leave your cell phone in the car or keep your annoying ass at home. Thank you.