Lesson of the Day:

A YOUNG MAN CALLED ALAN INVITED HIS MOTHER FOR DINNER.
DURING THE COURSE OF THE MEAL, HIS MOTHER COULDN'T HELP BUT
NOTICE HOW HANDSOME ALAN'S FLATMATE WAS.

SHE HAD LONG BEEN SUSPICIOUS OF A RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THE
TWO, AND THIS ONLY MADE HER MORE CURIOUS. OVER THE COURSE OF
THE EVENING, WHILE WATCHING THE TWO INTERACT, SHE STARTED TO
WONDER IF THERE WAS MORE BETWEEN ALAN AND HIS FLATMATE THAN
MET THE EYE.

READING HIS MUM'S THOUGHTS, ALAN VOLUNTEERED, "I KNOW WHAT YOU
MUST BE THINKING, BUT I ASSURE YOU, SIMON & I ARE JUST FLATMATES".

ABOUT A WEEK LATER, SIMON CAME TO ALAN SAYING, "EVER SINCE YOUR MOTHER CAME
TO DINNER, I'VE BEEN UNABLE TO FIND THE FRYING PAN, YOU DON'T SUPPOSE SHE TOOK IT DO YOU?"
"WELL, I DOUBT IT, BUT I'LL E-MAIL HER JUST TO BE SURE," SAID ALAN, SO HE SAT DOWN AND WROTE:

DEAR MOTHER, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID" TAKE THE FRYING
PAN FROM MY HOUSE, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID NOT" TAKE THE FRYING
PAN, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE
HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE ALAN

SEVERAL DAYS LATER, ALAN RECEIVED AN E-MAIL FROM HIS MOTHER
WHICH READ:

DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO" SLEEP WITH SIMON, AND I'M NOT
SAYING THAT YOU "DO NOT" SLEEP WITH SIMON, BUT THE FACT
REMAINS THAT IF HE WAS SLEEPING IN HIS OWN BED, HE WOULD HAVE
FOUND THE FRYING PAN BY NOW.
LOVE MUM

LESSON OF THE DAY:
DON'T EVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER (SHE ALWAYS, ALWAYS FINDS OUT!)