6 Word Story:

Handed Me Keys; Exploring Your Heart

Part II

Taking my Time; Finding Our Smiles

6 Word Story:

Empath; My Shoulder Carries Your Pain

6 Word Story:

Feelings Inside; Mine Alone, No Pitty

6 Word Story:

7 shots; no end in sight

6 Word Story:

"Smile; I'm having a human moment"

Good is Good

"Love’s on your list of things to do
To bring your good luck back to you
And if you think that everything’s unfair
Would you care if you’re the last one standing there" 


Intentions.  We all have them.  Good ones, bad ones, small ones, big ones.  Wait.  I'm about to go all Dr. Seuss here.

6 Word Story:

My System of Order through Chaos

6 Word Story:

Before you Love, You Should Learn

"There are people who hurt their best friend and when asked why they say they don't know, and they really don't."

This was in a reply from a post of a friend on FB.  It struck my thinkie spot so I wanted to blog it.

So much pain... it's surfacing and there isn't a bottle in sight.

I want to go home.

Fires Burn On

When you wake up to fire alarms going off in your house, that's probably a pretty good indication as to how your day is going to go.  Just because one is put out, doesn't mean another one isn't on the back burner ready to ignite and unleash slowly into your day.

In this case, it kinda just unleashes through your soul, slowly spreading, taking its time and making sure to hit every single, little spot along the way. 

Made its mark, don't forget, heading forward once again, out of the House of Self-Undoing.  You put your foot in it, now keep it out.

6 Word Story:

Black or Blank Canvas: Any Difference?

6 Word Story:

Just Can't Compete With the Past

6 Word Story:

Take Chances, Embrace Love, Kiss Slowly

6 Word Story:

Watching Her Light Bulb Go On

6 Word Story:

Do you feel what I feel?

                           "Uneven balance of strength and peace" 

                                photo by Teri Webb

I like to write.  I've taken a few classes but dabble mostly on my own time.  My mind is either going to help me get it down correctly or it's not.  I can't force it and usually what comes out pleases me.  One of my personal favs for writing exercises is to take a pic and write about it.  Poem, story, some dialogue, whatever is inspired.  My Tee took this pic and I have an affliction for things of a darker nature.  I couldn't help but notice how much more darke there was in this photo than light, so here is how that came to be...

The sky faeries were quite busy today prepping the sky for the night yet to come. The thought being the reflections of the sunset would place some fantastic pinks, oranges and reds on the clouds.  Of course, the sky sprites had other ideas, looming, darke ideas.  The faeries love to start at the top or mid sky and work their way down.  The notion being that if they begin their work upwards then toward the ground, once they finish, they can lay in the grass or the trees and admire their work.

Madalyne gathered her friends and off they went, wands in hands, transforming the sky with swashes of white, like a paint roller, leaving bits of blue to peak through.  The faeries were in great form tonight, leaving stair looking clouds, bridges, of course cloud animals for those creative enough to take the time and find them and so many great splashes of white it was hard to decide which way to look.  They finished up and napped in the trees with the wind swaying them to sleep while they waited for the decent of the sun.

Emily grabbed her friends and so began the counter to Madalyne & the other faeries hard work.  Working upwards, the sprites took their wands and like giant erasures, started covering and masking the white clouds.  The time they had to undo all that had been done is short and covering up everything isn't their prime motive.  They just like to add some extra flair.  The thought being that not everything is so pretty and rosy all the time, nothing wrong with a little darke to shadow the light.  A few extra strokes into the white and they were done.  Now they fly to the sides to watch the faeries reaction as they awake from their nap.

Natalye noticed it first and screamed, awaking all the other faeries.

"THEY did it AGAIN, Madalyne!" she screeched as she noticed her duckie had been covered up with a darke grey blob.

"Natalye, we know they do this almost everyday.  You know that this is the bidding of the sprites and that we must enjoy the act of what we do and not the actual outcome when the sun finally kisses whatever is left of our work, that is only ever a bonus and should not be counted upon to give us self satisfaction." Madalyne said with the most gentleness a voice could offer.  

Natalye is still very new and takes the bidding of the sprites so very personal but deep inside she knew Madalyne was right and let a little smile creep across her face.  Madalyne is so good at soothing her.  The faeries gathered around watching as the hues of the sunset start to bounce and touch what was left.  The sprites watched from afar, scowling at the ease of the attitudes from the faeries.

"Nothing bothers them and if it does, that Madalyne always fixes it!" One of the sprites growled.

"Do not worry, Madalyne won't be around forever... there will come a time when the faeries will give up and the skies will sing only of darkeness and grey clouds.  For now, we carry on waiting for our moment," said Emily in a low, raspy voice.

Emily was more right then she knew at that moment, Madalyne's time as Head Goddess of the Faeries would soon come to an end...

 

6 Word Story:

All over the map with you

I'm Pathetic

Cancer Diaries: Session (Week 2) of Radiation/Chemo/Iron Infusion

Typing those words above, make me wince and want to punch things.  I decided to take the day off to spend it with my mom on her BIG day.  Every Thursday she has to get her Chemo pack switched out, Radiation (well that is daily) and an Iron Infusion (which she is now done with, well for this minute).  She also meets with 2 of her doctors and gets her prescriptions reanalyzed.  It's a big day basically.

I want/need to be apart of what is going on so I wanted to tag along.  I go into things with such an open mind.  I try to not think the worst and keep hope at the forefront of my thoughts.  I arrived to find her already getting her Iron Infusion and resting.  Most people have good spirits and it's comforting to see.  My mom is still and I'm sure will be for a very long time, in an adjustment period.  Her moods are low and I can't say I blame her but it very out of character for her at the same time.  I'm her apple and any of you know how stubborn, determined and tunnel visioned I can be when I have my mind set on something.  I can command a room or sit in a corner to observe.  I don't ask for help, I am asked upon by others for help.  I have drive, a will to fight and an ability to love so very deep and with such passion it almost hurts at times.  These qualities my mom possesses and has bestowed and blessed me with almost seem now like they were passed off to me and not so much handed down now.

I watch her.  A lot.  I see her but it's not her.  This woman is quiet, soft spoken, weakened and at times, very lifeless.  I understand that this process is ridiculously tough.  More than ever now, I've seen how it's dug in and reduced my mom to the shell that she sits in currently.  I want my mom back.  I have to wonder if she will every really be back.  I can tell myself "someday" but there is this inkling of doubt in me that really wonders if someday will ever come.  I'm tucking that thought away, far, far away.  I refuse to let it consume me and push hope aside.

As she walked through the building yesterday and saw the other people going through their treatment, she looked at my aunt and said, 

"I wish I was strong like them.  I'm pathetic."  

My aunt looked at her and said, "WHAT did you JUST say?"

My mom repeated it again and I knew my aunt just wanted to unleash on her.  In a calmer voice than she wanted but still quite stern, she replied," You CAN and ARE just as strong as anyone else here.  You ARE NOT PATHETIC and don't ever say that again."

My mom just sat there quietly.

Now even at this moment, I'm crying.  To feel so defeated, so low, so helpless... that you could utter those words with such intent behind them.  *shakes head* I knew that it would get worse but that small voice she speaks with now... ~speechless~

Mom, someday I may show this to you.  Please know that you were always in my thoughts and I only ever wanted to fix every ounce of pain, every bit of sadness, every negative thing you were feeling, I wish more than anything I could've taken it on myself for you.  I'd have done it mom, as much as I hate needles, doctors, throwing up... I'd have taken it with no hesitation, no reservation.  I love you.  I love us and I'm waiting for the day we can walk the fairway together again.

6 Word Story:

Artists use lies to show truth